Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13‬:‭4-8‬ NIV)

During this time of planning a wedding, I am reminded that I’m also planning a marriage. As crazy as it sounds, sometimes a wedding takes a life of its own and you can lose sight of the reason for the wedding — love. I know the scripture above very well. I’ve read it, written it, painted it… It’s vividly engrained in my mind but yet I find myself failing at exhibiting these traits at the most important times. Like in middle of an argument all those phrases like “remember last time you said…” or the “you always…” “you never…” get thrown around.

When I look over my long relationship, I actually feel like I’ve regressed, grown a little too complacent that James will always be there. I’m reminded of a quote that I found years ago online that said “finally I understand little things are the most important in life.” At the time I thought I understood but now I grow to understand it more and more each day. I think about the small gestures, the things that make a relationship work, and I know I have to focus on those small things so much more.

I think that’s part of the reason why the divorce rate is so high. People focus so much on big things that they forget about the small things that make such a big difference to others. It’s like the snowball that turns into avalanche or a small compliment that brightens your whole day or the faith of a small mustard seed allowing you to move mountains. Each started so small but leave gigantic impacts. India.Aire realized this when she sang “Little Things.” James realized this years ago though I felt like I always struggled with this even to this day.

Over the last 29 years I feel like I’ve been trying to be superwoman and I’m kind of excited to just be Superwife. I pray that I’m the best wife I can be and that my heart and love are more like Christ.